thefutureisred

You Don't Have To Leave The House To See the World

I sit here today on the cusp of signing a one-year-lease on a little house in Salta. Can you imagine? One whole year living in one place? It seems almost unimaginable after more than two years of constant travel.

But wait! Does this mean I can no longer call myself a bonafide traveler? In some ways, yes. But mostly, no.

Travel isn't about having the crazy-hard story to tell, about the time you got stuck on the bad side of town with no idea where you were after missing your boat and ended up sharing your mat with a chicken. Although those are fun stories to tell. Travel also isn't just about seeing the wonderful sights and experiences this planet has to offer, although that's a huge part of it. I mean, imagine if I left Iceland never having visited the Blue Lagoon spa? (Which, by the way, I suggest visiting immediately upon arriving in the country. There's an airport bus that will take you and your luggage to the spa and then after, when you're properly relaxed, to Reykjavik.)

Travel is something else.

There's a certain openness of spirit common to all Travelers. Your eyes, ears and mouth open wide to even the most mundane of daily events, and each sense welcomes the new without judgment or expectation. It is, dare-I-say-it, exactly how a child sees the world.

Travel is about adapting to the new and allowing experience to wash over you without judgment. It's about rolling with the punches and not rolling your eyes.

And it is each person's choice to see the world as a Traveler or not, just as happiness is so often a choice. Living in one place with one job and one weekly schedule, it's easy to believe the restlessness or even unhappiness you feel comes from routine, but it's just as easy to recreate your routine on the road. Because no matter how little luggage you may bring along, you always bring yourself.

Of course, it's much easier to see the world anew when, in fact, everything you're seeing is actually new. Still, the challenge, at base, is to view each day, each event and each moment with fresh eyes.

So year-long-lease or two nights in a hut on some island, I will always strive to be a Traveler.

How To Pay For Two Years Of Travel -- Part II

Picking up from last Friday´s How to Pay For Two Years of Travel -- Part I.

When you have no choice but to pay for the night!

Sometimes, you´ll find yourself stuck and will have to pay by the night. There are always cheap options for this as well.

I have not yet visited a continent where you cannot find a hostel, although if you arrive too late in the day or during a particularly busy time -- such as Carnival in Central or South America -- you´ll be forced to turn to either camping out or a more expensive choice.

In France, Italy, Holland and just about every where else we stayed in Europe, we found we could trust in the quality of the places recommended by tourist offices, even if the prices seemed too good to be true. The owners are also willing to negotiate their prices if they have an empty room and someone in tourist information will do the negotiation for you. That's how we ended up at both La Beliere in Moustiers Sainte-Marie and La Matabone of Lourges. They were both new and thus empty at the height of tourist season. Both, I will add, were a bit out of the main tourist drag.

Wherever you are, don't be afraid to negotiate even if you're not fluent in the language. If nothing else, the negotiation gives you practice.

There's also the Etap chain - the cheapest of the Accor group of hotels found all over Europe. Cheap stay per night, includes breakfast, not luxury, but not bad at all, and you can usually get a room at the very last minute. Etap saved us from sleeping on the street more than one night.

Seek out advice from every possible place!

I consider this perhaps the most important thing you need to do. Start right now!

When we first decided to travel, we noticed that everyone and his mother had advice for us. We also found that many friends, family and even strangers had offers of places to stay, contacts in certain cities, and endless local insider information. It can be overwhelming and at times even unwanted.

Listen anyway. 

Someone might mention a job or place to stay for free. Having contacts can also help you immeasurably if you show up somewhere looking for work. As an example: When we first discussed traveling to Buenos Aires -- approximately nine months before we finally arrived in Argentina -- Noah contacted an old professor of his from City College who we knew had contacts in South America. He ultimately connected us to the place we´re now staying and working in Salta. It was a slow process, but now that we´re here, we have community in Salta who has helped us immeasurably.

I keep a Word -- or whatever text editor you use -- file on my desktop where I type down any and all information people give me. I make sure to include the name of the country or city along with whatever information I´ve been given. I don´t worry too much about order or neatness. When I want to find something, I simply do a search in the file for the country or place name.

Talk to other travelers. In most places, there is a circuit. Wherever you are, there will be a stream of people coming from all directions and destinations. You ask them all about how busy things are, how cheap, what’s the best way to get around, good places to stay, then plan your next step accordingly.Otherwise, I would never have known that the guy selling chicken sandwiches out of a trailer on the main street in Bocas serves one of the best chicken sandwiches I've ever had (always get the Jumbo with piquante and cheese.) Or that when everyone thought Bocas had been destroyed by earthquakes and flooding, I was able to let a friend of mine who leads GAP tours know that Bocas was indeed fine and open for business.

Again, Couchsurfing is a wonderful source of this sort of travel tips. As are TripAdvisor, Matador Travel, Twitter and Yahoo Groups (although with Yahoo, the personal profiles are more limited, so you don't have as much on which to judge the person giving advice).  On all, you can contact people directly or post in a larger group.

Get a job!

Teach English or another language you know.  Check out Nomadic Matt’s five part series on how to make money by teaching.

Make and sell jewelry or other crafts.

Are you a musician, a dancer, a performer of any kind? Do you want to be? While perhaps this is a bad idea in places like Atlanta or New York, where street performing and vending are discouraged, there are plenty places in this world who not only tolerate but encourage busking.

Performers and vendors in San Telmo´s Sunday Feria

Or you can apply for writing grants or art grants. You can start your own website. Sell your travel photography. Write for travel sites. Wait tables. Garden.Teach yoga or another skill of yours.

Brave New Traveler -- a section of Matador -- recently featured an article on 25 Ways To Earn Money When You're Broke On The Road with even more ideas.

Some last minute advice! It's all about your attitude!

You will be amazed at how open and giving people can be. Friends, family and perfect strangers have freely given advice, clothing, contacts, a place to stay or a meal. I, myself, try to be as giving. When we have a place of our own, we open our home, our table and our things for others.

My openness, however, has boundaries. There are always those who will take advantage, so you have to read, research and know what how much your willing to pay or give before agreeing to anything. That said, people have overwhelmingly helpful. We have had only one less than stellar experience, and that only involved the loss of some snorkel equipment and a towel.

Also remember that no one owes you anything, no matter what they promise. Don't bother getting yourself all worked up when someone offers help then doesn't deliver.  Instead, be patient, focus on those people who do come through and then move on.

I suppose that´s exactly what I mean when I say we´re traveling one day at a time. Each day brings new surprises, enchantments and yes, even disappointments. You take them as they come. It´s character building, and that, I believe is the very crux of traveling.

Hiking in Moon Valley

If you are in San Pedro de Atacama, you must visit El Valle de la Luna. Rent a car or bike or join a tour in town and go. 

Hello From The Driest Place On Earth

It's not terribly far from Salta to San Pedro de Atacama, but I've just walked into a totally different world.

San Pedro is a stopping point for people traveling from Argentina, Bolivia, Peru and elsewhere in Chile. It's square on the travel circuit, and a bit overwhelming with all the sheer naked tourism.

Dirt streets lead from all parts of town to the central plaza where I'm waiting for Noah. He is off finding a place for us to stay while Lila uses the last of the sandwich they gave us on the bus to tempt the dogs.

She had a tough ride. Altitude sickness. Everyone we spoke with, including a nurse at the border who gave Lila oxygen, advised eating sugar. Yes sugar. Myself, I'm not convinced, but we gave it to her anyway. In fact, Lila can have as much sugar as she wants. Perhaps that's why she's feeling so much better?

How To Pay For Two Years Of Travel -- Part I

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And as always, I welcome comments and ideas. Now, onto the article you came here to see.

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I'm asked this question often. Are we independently wealthy? Do we work along the way? Do we stay with other people?

The answer to all three questions is yes.

First, we gave up or sold just about everything we had before leaving the United States. Apartment, furniture, appliances, all of it. We only kept what we needed or what was most important to us -- art, books, music and all Lila's baby stuff.

Then we put aside a certain amount of money and said we'd travel until it was gone. It's enough as long as we make careful choices. We work along the way, sometimes exchanging work for a place to stay. We have home shared, couchsurfed and learned to travel cheaply.

It is not as expensive to travel as you may think!

Long term travel is not like a vacation. You have let go of everything at home and thus don't have to worry about rent, school payments, gas, electricity, water, and all the other payments that keep you tied to a needing a certain level of income per month. 

We have two bills we pay per month. One is a phone bill which goes automatically on our credit card. The other is our credit card bill. We pay them both online and with the exception of our months in Europe, our monthly credit card expenses rarely exceed one thousand dollars. Then add to that rent and travel expenses such as buses, airline tickets, car rental and gas.

There's a lot to be had for free or at least very cheap!

Food: Local markets are the best. You'll find the best food for the best prices. 

Don't discount street food. Along the way, we've had crepes, empanadas, johnny cakes, tamales, bunuelas, cupcakes, the best chicken sandwiches on earth, fruit, vegetables, and so much else bought for pocket change. Often, this food is home made or made on the spot, and the people making it are usually local so they know the best places to buy bread, cheese, fish and vegetables.

Lodging: One word: Couchsurfing. We've couchsurfed for approximately half of our two years traveling. Sometimes, the three of us squeezed onto a small couch in someone's living room. Sometimes, we've had an apartment all to yourselves. If this is something you plan to do, create your Couchsurfing profile immediately and start meeting people. The more people you know, the more connections and references you have, the more people will feel comfortable opening their homes to you.

There are other options as well. WWOOFing, for example. Where you work in exchange for food and a place to stay. There are WWOOF options all over the world. Some are best for singles, but many are even better for families with children. Imagine staying on a small farm in the Andes with a family with three children. You'll tend the garden, learn to keep beehives and improve your spanish while living with a host family.

In addition, you can check out Home Exchange, Hospitality Club, idealist.org and Voluntourism. These are just a meager beginning of the options out there, but they are a good place to begin your research.

Entertainment: We've never found a place that was too expensive to find something cheap and unique to do. Even Iceland, home of the 40 dollar hamburger -- at the time of our visit, anyway -- had many very affordable options. Gullfoss waterfall, Geysir hot spring area and Þingvellir National Park are all free entry. The thermal baths to be found in every city and village of Iceland are also very affordable, even if you plan on renting a towel or bathing suit.

The best, though, in Iceland was happening into Halgrim's Church in Reykjavik in time to hear the gorgeous Klais organ tuned and played in our own private concert.

In Provence, we found endless candy and perfume factories you could tour for free or almost nothing. The Florian Candy Factory in Nice gives free tastings in their gift shop after your tour.

We've found most of these things while just exploring places on foot.  The feria at the Mercado Municipal on San Martin in Salta, for example. Or get on a local bus and ride around until you see something you want to explore.

Paying for a night's sleep is much more expensive than paying for a month of sleep!

We stayed in Provence at Domaine de la Begude for three weeks at a much reduced rate in the height of tourist season. We also rented by the month in Buffalo, Atlanta, Buenos Aires and Bocas del Toro. All far cheaper than had we rented by the day. In Buenos Aires, for example, you can find apartment rentals for 500-800/month as opposed to the at least 75 dollars a night you would pay at a hotel.

You also have a kitchen, which means you save even more because you cook for yourself. You also have the benefit of exploring the food offerings of local panaderias, boucheries y mercatos where you'll learn more about language, culture and people than you will at the nearest tourist trap.

Coming next week!

When I began writing this article, I intended for it to be only one entry, but it turned out to be far longer than I expected.

See How To Pay For Two Years of Travel, part II in which I discuss:

• Where to stay when you have no choice but to pay for the night.
• How to find work along the way.
• How to find the most current travel information for anywhere in the world,
• And some basic travel advice.

Also, some upcoming topics:

• What To Keep In Mind When Traveling With A Child
  
• Women Traveling Solo
• What To Do In Case of Emergency

In the meantime, feel free to email with any questions or leave your comments on the page. As always, subscribe to my feed to be informed when new posts go up.

So then, until next week....

A Total Newbie Answers the Question: What Good Is Twitter?

 If you aren't already, please follow me on Twitter!

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I joined Twitter almost two years ago. I remember exactly where I was too. In an Etap hotel just outside of Marseilles. I was introduced to it by @arincrumley, one of the creators of Four Eyed Monsters. That was the same day I started my blog. But at that point, it was so slow and painful to twitter from a Blackberry, I didn't bother.

Since then, I've been so busy with moving, traveling and the like, that it only barely hit my radar. I figured when I was more settled and finally thought of good use for Twitter, I'd wait to get involved. Then I started receiving notices that people were following me on Twitter.

"Following what?" I wondered. Still more followed, and finally, my curiosity got the best of me. I logged onto my account.

That was about ten days ago, and now I am hooked. So what good is twitter? I'll tell you!

1. Work and Personal Benefits

It's like a huge online cocktail party with tens of thousands of people chatting 24 hours a day. You are always connected to people with similar interests, both work and personal, all over the world. I'm in touch with others interested in yoga, gardening, sustainable development, art and teaching.

So far I have learned endless amounts about the technical side of building a better blog, how to use Twitter, Wordpress and how to work public relations and social media outlets. Thanks @DaivRawks. This man, Daiv Russell-Ninja Nerd has almost 20K followers and somehow manages to keep up with them all. He offers sound advice on anything technical. I sent him a question once and was amazed to see his response within a few minutes.

There are others too: @mashable @mayhemstudios @PRsarahevans and @skydiver.

@skydiver, by the way, is Peter Shankman, founder of Help A Reporter. If you are a writer of any type, business owner, website analyst, really anything, you need to check out his site. I'd also like to mention that I met him twice. First, at the 1996 Democratic convention in Chicago. The second time, I was struggling to carry my child and her stroller down the subway stairs at the Columbus Circle station in NYC just before we left to travel. He stopped to ask if I needed help.

I've met other travelers. @collazoprojects. Julie Shwietert, a writer and traveler from NYC and Puerto Rico writes wonderfully on her blog about all topics ranging from travel to politics and more.

I met Julie through the Twitter posts of @umarket of Uncornered Market fame. Their website follows their absolutely amazing travels through tens of countries. Their thoughtful articles and striking imagery make you want to visit. If you can't, though, you have this sneaking feeling that you've been with them through China, Kyrgyzstan, Nepal, Latvia and so many other places I simply cannot list them here.

There's also @ARoadRetraveled. @tripwolf. @travelojos. I've chatted and compared travel notes with all these people. In addition, each has a website where you can learn more about their experiences traveling and perhaps one day, I will write for some of them or they will guest blog for me.

Sometimes, you find inspiration. @kendrathornbury, for example, is a Life Coach, Spiritual Guide, Manifest Mastermind Guide, Law of Attraction Guru, SpiritAlive Creator, Joyous Being, Free Spirit, Humanitarian, Alive Enthusiast (as her profile says). Each day, she posts wonderful statements about how to move yourself more freely through life and reach your goals.

"When you are aware and awake in the moment, you have the leverage to create whatever you want. U are not a slave to circumstances," she posted last night. And there is such a lovely picture of her smiling on the beach on her website.

I've met other parents. @fogandthistle Another NYC mom. She has a blog and Etsy shop where she sells original papercut designs. I plan to buy one of her gorgeous nightlights. Lila has been asking for one for quite a while and her room here in Salta is so unbelievably dark at night.

And finally, it's a great source of news. I'm following all sorts of news outlets such as @nytimes, @suntimes, @guardiannews. And BOOM, all headlines with links are sent directly to me.

"But why do I need all this information?" I'm sure many of you are still asking yourselves. I've already seen more visitors to my blog. And, well, I guess I may as well tell you. I have a new project brewing. It involves an expansion of the What Lila Sees section of this website. I'm aiming to launch in June.

There are other less obvious benefits to Twitter as well.

1. Improved Memory

Imagine. You are following the information threads of anywhere from 10 to 10,000 people. It's a constant stream of information. Then one day, you see a reply from someone line @CouchsurfingOri saying "Could've been that stalker! :)"

What? I had no idea what he meant. Was that message intended for someone else? I had to think back to all my interactions with him and all the things I posted in the past day or so. Then I got it! I posted something about that horrible yowling outside our casita last night. "What the hell was it?" I wondered.

2. Teaches Patience

You can't ask everything at once. And when you do make contact with some, you can't just blurt out right from the beginning: "I have the great idea. You really should help me." No, you have to start chatting, understand who the person is, what they do. You have to get to know them as you would in real life, but on Twitter, you rarely receive the immediate response you would at a real cocktail party. You have to wait for your answer.

3. Encourages Positive Thinking

There is a real culture of Pay It Forward. I've noticed the things that attract the most interest, tend to benefit as many people as possible. @twitchhiker, for example. He's a reporter for the Guardian who intends to travel for a month soley with the help of Twitter tips. All money he raises goes to charity.

People credit each other for posting solid articles and thoughts by this funny little thing called retweeting. By retweeting, you also help yourself. The person you credit is thankful and passes along your name. The people who appreciate what you've passed along thank you as well.

And since this is a site so often used for marketing, almost everyone I've encountered presents a positive, helpful face. You have to be open to people and you never know from where a good idea will arise, so most people are willing to have conversations and help. In ten days, I have yet to see anyone be anything but decent and constructive. A far cry from You Be Mom, where people remain anonymous and tend to tear each other apart.

4. It Is the DOS Version of the Future
Best yet! Twitter is it's own world with it's own rules. In it, you open yourself to a constant stream of information from so many disparate sources. It's absolutely dizzying. Hot dang if I don't feel like Johnny Mnemonic, only the yakuza aren't chasing me and presumedly my head won't explode if I don't find the key to the data stored in my head.

One day, I'm betting we'll receive this feed directly into our brains. There, we'll meet our Twitterverse Tweeples wearing brilliant 3D avatars lounging on sumptuous digital couches and sipping martinis while sorting through the latest information about some big business mogul releasing a horde of insects into a crowd or accept a request to speak to a classroom of children in the South of France or Guam. I imagine my eyelids will be quickly fluttering as I receive the information.

Yeah, Twitter. I drank the Kool Aid. I'm a true believer now.

How Can You Be Homesick When You Don´t Have A Home

We packed the car to stuffed and drove out of Brooklyn. Over the Verrazano into New Jersey and on on on. We went through Hershey, Graceland, Rome, Paris and Amsterdam. Panama City, Lima, Miami, Buffalo and Buenos Aires. And except for a brief and terrible moment in Harrisonburg, VA, where Noah and I got into a screaming fight and almost called everything -- the trip, the marriage, the whole thing -- quits, we never looked back.

Well, of course I looked back. I thought about friends, places, memories, but I never felt sad.

Until recently.

The past two months I´ve been horribly homesick. Which home? I´m not even sure. I just miss...well...I miss.

• I miss our IKEA MALM bed in Brooklyn and the way the maroon curtains tinted the room with their color.
• I miss Monteleone´s bakery. Amazing cheesecake and canoli. Truly the best you´ll ever have.
• I´m sad that my Lexington Coop bag got ruined when I washed it.
• I miss lazy days sitting with our newborns at Naidre´s (used to be Cammareri Brothers Bakery of Moonstruck fame)
• I miss Chinese food. Lord knows why. I never eat it when I can get it. But the fact that I can´t find any places here that are in anyway similar to the Chinese food I want, suddenly, I need it.
• I miss Sunday afternoons with the whole fam damily in Atlanta.
• I miss knowing where to get a good  haircut and where to find shoes that aren´t gladiator sandals.
• I miss peanut butter and maple syrup. (PLEASE IF YOU VISIT BRING SOME)

Most of the things I miss are silly. Usually food. Usually foods I don´t eat. It´s random what will strike a chord and suddenly this deep longing develops somewhere between my stomach and my heart.

Would I go back? I suppose it´s possible for us to leave here and return to any of the places we´ve lived. Top choices being Brookyn, Buffalo (clearly I´m eating my words on this one) and Atlanta.

But we´re here now, and much as I miss, I don´t want to go back. I want, well, I´m not entirely sure what I want. It´s hard to believe whatever void in me can be filled with peanut butter and sweet and sour chicken with tangy neon sauce and bits of pineapple.

What is it I want? And why did this start now? I don´t know.

Anyone else care to take a guess?

How Many Jews Does It Take To Make A Christmas Party?

Tomorrow night, there's a Couchsurfing Christmas dinner. Argentinians are with their families and don't seem to be around so much these days, but there are a lot of us others floating about.

Originally, I offered our place for the dinner, but when it seemed like more than 20 people were coming, the venue was switched to elsewhere. Now it's at Dan's place, and I'm doing what I can to help him organize.

Now it looks like it could be upwards of 50 people. This should be a lot of fun.

For me, this Christmas dinner is about meeting new people and spending time with other travelers who are away from home on a day they would normally be with family and friends. It's not just about the particular holiday.

But what about Lila? How does she see all of this?

I know I'm Jewish and it has always been such a part of my identity that I don't think twice about it. I know at least a few of my family members are worried that Lila will not be brought up properly Jewish. And if they want her to be Orthodox, then no, she will not be properly Jewish. I do, though, want her to know that she is Jewish, know the holidays, learn Hebrew, and have some idea of Jewish History.

I also want her to be able to go to a Christmas party, wish someone an Eid Mubarak or experience a Hindu wedding and not feel like she's doing something wrong. In fact, I hope she would want to know about other people's traditions, holidays and enjoy the celebration.

A few months ago, though, Lila got very upset when we told her she's Jewish.

"No," she shouted. "I'm not Jewish. Not Jewish." She stomped her feet and left I shocked. "What was that?" we asked ourselves. The first thought that we never wanted our families to hear her say these things, because they would most certainly blame it on us. That was fall out I did not need.

But I don't think either of us are anti-Jewish nor do i believe we have passed that message onto Lila.  It did make me wonder who in her life portrayed "jewish" as something bad. Then again, with a child of four years old, you never know how connections come together in their growing brains.

So how to deal with this Judaism issue? I don't want her to think I'm upset with her for not seeming to want to be Jewish. Because, really, I'm not even sure what it means to her to be Jewish. Then add to this, the constant travel? It's not easy. It's a priority to meet families with children because I want to make sure Lila doesn't spend all her time with adults, entertaining herself. But we rarely meet other Jewish families.

Much of our Judaism comes when we spend time with family and close friends. We light Chanuka candles with the cousins. Last Rosh Hashana we spent with Ken in Buffalo. Succot was with Ken, Rachel and finally my parents in Atlanta. We spend shabbat with friends in NY, with my parents, with Noah's sisters. And we do as much as we can on our own. I do have to admit, though, what we do on our own is a bare minimum, particularly when finding housing or transportation to the next city is on our minds.

This year, on the first night of Chanuka, we tried going to the Chabad chanuka lighting. When we arrived, we found nothing but an enormous chanukiya with the shamash and one light already lit. And crickets chirping.

So yesterday, when Lila asked me "When will Christmas be here," I started to worry about this again, because she hasn't asked a word about Chanuka.

What will we do?

We'll still go to this Christmas dinner, because it's important to have community wherever you are. But to make a point for Lila, we bought the makings of our own chanukiyah and will bring it along and light it, so we can all celebrate together, all of us, all the holidays. Everyone is welcome.

What Is Said Through the Augury of Birds?

Playing a bit of catch up: It was a long and round about route to Buenos Aires, taking us through Miami, Panama, Bocas, Costa Rica, a short stop in Lima and then finally. Here.

Miami: Quick stop. Just running from gate to gate. We arrived late, so I wasn't sure we'd make our connecting flight. I asked a woman dressed in an official looking blue uniform how to get to our connecting gate.

"Turn left, then right at the sign," but clearly, she was disinterested.

What she failed to mention is that after turning right, you walk straight for ten minutes, then turn again, keep going, then up the stairs, onto a train. Once the train arrives, you take it I-don't-remember-how-many stops to another building where you keep walking until you reach a crowded waiting room in bad need of rennovation.

We made the flight, just barely. But Lila was hungry and we had no time to stop for food or at duty free for a bottle of wine (Sorry, Randall, at least I brought the M&Ms).

Panama: We arrive in the evening. The airport is packed. We wait for visas, wait for customs, wait for luggage, wait for immigration. Wait, while all the while Lila is still hungry and asking for food where there is no food. I'll admit, thought, she was unbelievably mature about it. It did break my heart, though, when she asked "Why, Mama, did you leave the marshmallows and chocolate chips on the airplane." She asked over and over and over. "I would eat them now," she told me. Even thought she hadn't wanted them on the plane.

IT WAS A MISTAKE. I DIDN'T MEAN TO LEAVE THEM IN THE FRONT SEAT POCKET WITH THE SAFETY CARD AND BARF BAG!!!! I'M SORRY.

Fred's car glided by Tocumen exit just as we walked out. Perfect timing. Thank you again to him for driving through the traffic and pouring rain to get us. We stayed up late talking. Then up early, early for Fred and Mel's new baby's naming. Ilana. She is adorable, looks just like Fred and is quite a child. You can tell she wants to be a part of everything.

I'd like to also add a quick thank you to Rochelle and Mark (friends of Fredd and Mel's) who had us over for Thanksgiving dinner. I love the holiday and was sad to miss it. They even had stuffing. Because really, what is Thanksgiving without stuffing?

That's when we learned of the flooding and mudslides in Bocas. "No way you're going," everyone told us. But I still saw updates on Facebook from friends there. They didn't even mention the rain. How bad could it be? We go anyway.

Of course, we almost don't make our flight because the alarm doesn't go off, and we wake up at the exact time we are supposed to be at the airport. Still, we jump around, shower, grab Lila still asleep and run for a cab to the airport making it just in time. Barely. (So now you know you can be late to catch the flight to Bocas and still be first on the flight if you have a child.)

We spent most of our time with Ozzy and Trevor. They lived in the house behind ours last year. Now, they've moved further down the beach. Ozzy cooked her amazing Turkish food. We hung out, talked, drank wine, and gossipped (once again) about everything we'd missed in Bocas over the six months.

A hawk perched on the tree outside the house, calling and singing while all the tomcats of the island prowled around looking for, well, I'm not quite sure what they wanted, because there weren't any eager female cats around.

What is it with all this bird imagery? First the cardinal in Atlanta. A very unexpected Thanksgiving turkey, and now the hawk.  If life is art, then someone is trying to tell us something.

I choose to think it's something good.

(More on the rest of the trip to come... specifically with pictures. Some really lovely ones from a cloud forest in Costa Rica, outside of San Ramon.)

Landing Softly With A Bump

We're here. Finally, after more than six months of planning, thinking, figuring, we're here.

Yep, We're here. I have to keep telling myself that, because most of the time, I'm not sure where I am.

Our flight here took us through Miama, Panama, Bocas, Costa Rica, Lima and then finally. Here. There were at least three sleepless nights and one-almost missed flight in there, but it was great fun.

Buenos Aires is sort of a bizarro New York. Every new place somehow reminds me of a place I used to go. Or a sort of melange of places. Palermo is like the East and West Villages melded with Park Slope. Recoleta reminds me of parts of downtown Manhattan. Even the smell brings back spring mornings in the city. The odor of concrete, cigarette smoke and exhaust, but here whisps of baking bread and roasting meat creep in as well. No one makes eye contact. The streets are lined with London plane trees. Cabs everywhere, as well as everything you could possible want and need right outside your door.

There's culture shock, for sure, but it's more from spending time in Central America and then coming here to this bustling metropolis. Here, I'm immediately comfortable because it's a city. I know city. Country is far more confusing when you can't just step out your door to find food. Only here, everyone speaks Spanish, the people look a bit different and the empanada's are much better.

I am also painfully jetlagged. Without an alarm, I wake at noon. My entire self feels heavy and I feel like I'm walking through water. Until around 11pm, when I wake up and am ready to go.

Slowly, it's hitting me. We're here. I don't know anyone. I don't know my way around. This place, so familiar in its citi-ness, completely overwhelms me; it is enormous. I haven't felt this way since, well, since I moved to NYC.

We're Going Back to Bocas

Actually, we're back in Bocas now. Arrived just after a huge storm, probably bigger tban any they've had in 100 years. The roads on the mainland to here are damaged. Food, water and other supplies were cut off for a while. But things are back to normal now. Except no tourists.

Sometimes This Traveling Is A Bore, When It's Not Driving You Nuts

I was just in NYC. I didn't like it much. Two days there, and I find myself slipping back into the same habits as before. I stop saying hello to people, never smile at anyone. I keep to myself.

 

How did I not notice this when we lived here?

 

We carried some of this New York as we drove south for what may well be the last time. It might not; it might. The first day was hellish. Imagine this. Noah and I in the front bickering for at least three of the seven hour drive our first day. Did I say bickering? No, fighting. Straight out, no purpose fighting. We brought back past grievances and hurled accusations. There was shouting, crying and long stretches of silence following statements like “Whatever.” Or “This conversation is over.” And begin again.

 

I considered jumping out of the car and just running. Where? To what? No idea. I just wanted to get away from just sitting there with all that negative energy (yes).

 

This, thankfully, was infinitely better than our first drive to Atlanta after the first time we left NY.

Amazing how things have changed and yet the same patterns are always there. Traveling is exciting at the beginning. Everything is always new. Now, after almost two years, constant change has become our norm.

 

I've learned a lot since we left NY. Learned how to adapt to whatever situation arises. Learned to let go of the things we can’t carry with us. And I feel like I’ve moved closer toward the type of person I’d ultimately like to be.

 

Clearly, we humans like our patterns. In NY, I took the same roads to the subway each day, most times forgetting myself and suddenly finding myself ast my destination. While the streets were the same, when pressed, I couldn’t have told you which actual route I took. Did I go up Henry? Or Clinton? I didn’t remember.

Now I can't remember which road we took each of the six times we've driven this route (3 times round trip).  

 

They say children need boundaries, stability and routine in order to feel secure. When Lila tantrums because we want her to go to bed or buy her a new doll, and we refuse to budge because of the tantrum, she seems happier when we hold true to those edges. A new toy won’t make her happier, but knowing she is safe within defined borders does. The tantrums are horrible and often occur when stuck in traffic on a highway somewhere. I’m talking screaming unintelligibly at the top of her lungs, kicking the back of my seat, heartwrenching cries too. But after, after things all calm down, Lila will then repeat happily, “I was screaming so I couldn’t have chocolate.”

 

She understands.

 

I think we say that children need boundaries, though, because we so desperately need them ourselves. We just don’t have someone forming them, often arbitrarily, for us.

 

I suspect that once again it is all about finding balance. Routine is comfortable and necessary, but it can also become too binding. Complete freedom is wonderful too albeit extremely rare.

So back to the car driving down Interstate 81 -- or is it 81, 84, 85 or 95?. We're in one place but moving. We fought all day one, but day two the cloud lifted and we calmed down, figured things out.

 

Because when all is said and done, what else are we going to do but work it out?

The Inevitable Lightness of Dark (Or Some Such Nonsense)

It's the paradox of the move that does it. We're in one place but moving. Lila and I are baking cookies tomorrow for her teachers. Noah's picking up a package at DHL. It's our first day of dogsitting Cosby (who seems rather irate these days, although I'm mostly sure he wasn't offended by my last post.)

Everything slows down the week before we move. We don't go out as much. Don't see as much, and we don't seem to get as much done. Yet the days slip and slide forward so fast I don't know Monday from Friday. I suppose it's something like turning a corner. You're slowing down, slowing down, but really speeding up at the same time.

Does this make any sense at all?

I didn't make it to yoga and the abortion protest this week bc we went to Toronto again to see family. This coming weekend will be my last chance. I haven't started Lila's Halloween costume. We didn't go to Maid of the Mist or Cave of the Winds.

Between now and Monday morning, I plan to go through all our stuff, pick something up from DHL, launder and iron the cloth for Lila's costume, make cookies for Lila's teachers, give a donation to a couple charities around here, do laundry, mail some stuff back to Atlanta because it won't all fit in the car and plan the trip down to Atlanta. Also, go to four yoga classes so I can use up the rest of my ten-class pass (unless someone else wants it. If so, let me know. I'd be happy to ask Darcy if she'll transfer it to someone else), take pictures of the protesters. I have a list of questions in my head for them. Should probably write them down but whenever I try, I forget them.

Blah blah blah. Have you noticed that between moves I list all the things to do, to go, to be?

I've noticed. It's tedious as hell, but it's what in my head now. It's my process, so now those of you who have asked how we do this, this is it. To do lists and you just don't think about it too much more. You really can't think too much about it, because if you do, it's becomes more difficult to reach the ends of those lists.

Have I mentioned preparing Lila to go. We've already started the goodbyes, returned our library books, barbequed with the in-laws one last time. We go through our clothes and decide what to pack. Begin to talk about what we'll do next week, the week after, where we're going, who we'll see.

All this before Monday morning, when we start the decent from Move to Road Trip to Month in Atlanta to Deal with Last Details of Argentina to ARGENTINA.

It is evitable. A ball rolling down hill, and yet I still feel like I'm on the steep uphill of the next leg the journey.

Thank You!

I've am simply overwhelmed by the response I've had from all of you!

Over the last few days, I've heard from tens of people, from strangers offering good will and advice to old friends saying hello and bringing lovely memories and some serious nostalgia with their words.

I got an e-mail from Andrea, the woman who teaches Sign-a-Song in Brooklyn. It's an amazing class to take with your child. The idea is that babies learn to use their hands earlier than they vocalize, so by extension, babies learn to communicate with their hands months earlier than they would talk. I cannot quite explain to you the feeling of seeing your 10 month old baby telling you she wants to eat or more or sleep instead of crying while you --tired new mom or dad-- try to figure out what's wrong.

Lila even modeled for the sign language book they published. That was a funny day. A bunch of mothers and maybe a father or two desperately trying to coax their under 2 year olds to sign, please sign, just something? please?. Lila, for her part, just sat there looking bald and cute, didn't sign a wit and then started signing for everything the second, literally the second we walked out the photography studio door, even signs she'd never used prior to that day.

There have also been countless comments and e-mails from people I've never met. People of all ages and genders.Travelers who wrote to share their experiences and make suggestions. Others who would like to travel but aren't quite sure what type of traveling they want to or can do.

Many of you have called me an inspiration. While I am beyond flattered by such a thing, I shy away from it because I'm honestly not sure what I, alone, have done to inspire. I have had an unbelievable amount of support, help and encouragement from so many people. I can't even begin to thank them all. Without them, my life would not have been able to take the direction it has taken.

I've been talking with the owner of another blog. Andrew from Lyved: Life and Living It. I'll be guest blogging for him, writing a piece called something like Leaving It All Behind and How To Do It. 

Your thoughts and comments have encouraged me to finish it faster than I'd intended because it seems like something people want to read (and every writer needs readers). You've also given me many more things to think about and to include in that article. It will be richer, clearer and better because of you.

So again, I find myself thanking others. You have inspired me to write more, to continue with this blog and the projects I have planned for it (because sometimes, blogging can be, well, more like slogging) and generally to keep moving and traveling.

ps. I am still reading through e-mails and comments and will write back to everyone individually as soon as I can.